Saturday, March 16, 2013

Missing User's Guide Needed

So. Devastatingly Handsome knows I am saving my pennies for some sort of new electronic toy: maybe an iTouch or a Samsung Galaxy Player or some sort of tablet. 

Somewhere around 3 or 4 AM, he presented me with a red Galaxy, the phone, though, not the player. The first thing I noticed was the extreme thickness of it ~ about 5/8 of an inch. Then I noticed it was a 64 gb. That seemed to account for the thickness. Then I started looking at the features, like a page of text, top to bottom, left to right.

See, I have often thought cell phones are similar to Swiss Army Knives. You carry just one item around and it handles lots of varied functions. Well, this red Galaxy proves me right. The first three features I came to were ~ and understand, these are not apps but true physical features built into the phone ~ a toothpick in a small sleeve, a tiny hummingbird feeder, and a wee bottle of hand sanitizer. 

At this point I realized it was not the same Galaxy I had looked at on Amazon and Best Buy's sites. I asked Devastatingly if he could pass me the user's guide.

"Um...," he said, "they did not actually put anything like that in the box."

I thought that odd and asked to see the packing materials. He took me to the mudroom and showed me a beat up wooden crate, about 2 feet by 2 feet by 7 feet long that had some big chunks of styrofoam in it and also contained a little wooden box the size two pounds of Velveeta comes in, that held polished stone butterflies about the size of eggs, made of agates and jaspers. But no instruction manual, no charging cords or accessories, no information on returns or customer service. The only paperwork was a receipt, for $86.50. 

Thank you, Devastatingly, for the gift. You get extra points for making sure it was red and for the amazing features. Since I can't make it work, though, I sure hope you can get your money back. And I also wish I had seen the rest of the features before I woke up.

2 comments:

  1. I was so convinced this was real until the hummingbird feeder! Maybe you should patent this idea.

    Peace and Laughter!

    ReplyDelete

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